Are we cooking for boyfriends now ?

The other day, someone sent me a video on Instagram. The guy In the video was asking why London women visit their boyfriends not cook, but would rather have sex willingly . He confirmed that Nigerian girls in Nigeria cook but girls here don’t cook. So I guess the burning question all guys want to know is, will you cook for your boyfriend? I will like to CLEARLY STATE that GIRLS COOK FOR THE PEOPLE THEY CARE ABOUT, if she’s not cooking then you are not doing something right 👀🤷🏽‍♀️. I don’t care for the put a ring on my finger school of thought before a boyfriend gets a cooked meal from his girlfriend. Why are you even dating if either of you can’t cook for each other? So do you guys eat out all the time? Personally, I don’t see a big deal in cooking for your boyfriend. If you like him and want to cook for him, there’s nothing stopping you from cooking. I’ve cooked for exes in the past and I have no regrets . My approach to cooking for a boyfriend is you have to cook on your terms . I won’t ever let it get to the stage that it’s compulsory I cook every week. In fact, I suggest you don’t include it in your weekly routine. Your boyfriend was eating before he met you so trust me, he won’t die if you don’t cook every week. Let him miss your cooking sometimes.

image from google images

Reasons she won’t cook for you
Stage of the relationship: If it’s still new and she’s not sure exactly of your intentions, she won’t cook. Cooking isn’t exactly easy, it’s time consuming and involves a lot of standing, sometimes oil splashes in your eye, on the skin etc. She needs to know that you are committed before she starts making sacrifices.

Value proposition: I believe every form of relationship we foster with people is because there’s a benefit in there for you. For example, choosing to live a Christian life because you want to make heaven. Getting married to benefit companionship , paying bills together, raising kids together etc. The value we get from friendship includes loyalty, gist partners, people to do things with, a listening ear etc. A lot of relationships in Nigeria are financed by the guys, so the girls cook in return or starts playing the wife role because she’s gaining financial benefits from the guy. How then do you convince a girl that’s independent and possibly don’t need anything from you that she should come and cook for you? This is a case of London girls. Imagine she can take care of herself, pays her bills, does everything herself. Where’s the value in her cooking for you? Till you can identify what exactly you bring to the relationship, you might not get a cooked meal.

Not confident in her cooking skill: Some girls may not necessarily know how to cook, so they won’t attempt to cook at all. If you are truly in an understanding relationship, you can teach her and cook together. I don’t know who says only women should be cooking. As Africans we are quick to adapt other qualities in other cultures but so bent on patriarchy and the idea that women must do the cooking. It’s archaic and part of the things holding us back.

You failed to ask: sometimes you only have to ask. If you want a cooked meal from your girlfriend ask her and just don’t assume that she’s supposed to cook for you. Of course, you should know that you have to ask nicely. Also, if you don’t give her money don’t expect her to buy the ingredients from her pocket. If she agrees to cook for you, supply the ingredients or give her some money to buy what she needs to cook for you.

She’s just in a relationship with you for sex: It is common for men think every woman wants to be wifed. News flash, girls like sex too and not all women are interested in marriage. Men are quick to say I had sex with her, so? She had sex with you too. It is weird to some men think women don’t need sexual pleasures. This is why once they have an ejaculation, they don’t bother to ensure their partners are also satisfied. I should probably save this topic for another blogpost. My point is she can decide not to cook for you because she only wants sex from you. In conclusion, I believe everyone should learn how to cook, it is an essential skill to have. Also, girls don’t let any man turn you to chef all in the name of satisfying boyfriend. Always remember to cook on your terms. Pls leave a comment below and share with others. See you all next time ❤️.

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